Friday, February 24, 2012

fired up.

No. 6 (all images via still the sky is blue)

Last  night, I landed a short consultancy researching Cambodia issues for an exciting global project housed in a big NYC institution! (Vague, I know.)   Assuming I am on schedule with the research, this project timeline should work beautifully with my July and August trips to Indonesia and India (i.e., should not interfere).  It will also mean more focus and work from me in the next 2 months, and invariably, some frustration.

Sometimes, and this was the case in private practice as well, I felt like such an impersonator in law school, at the firm, in court, with clients.  It boggled my mind that I was being paid to read, write, research, and argue.  I felt like one day they'd find out I really couldn't do it.   I've spoken to many people since then and I wonder if this fear of our ability to contribute is not more common, as many female lawyers confessed to me the same feeling. 

Well, with international human rights lawyering and research, I've had a similar fear.  Who am I to be able to do this work? What do I know?  Being around amazing, speak-five-languages, globe-trotting lawyers, researchers and academics can be intimidating. 

And so I was a little shocked when I was contacted immediately for this small consultancy and then hired.  Me?!  Yay to me.  This is a project that would have been completely out of reach two years ago.

Also, I LOVE the spring stuff from No. 6.  The world needs more brightly-hued clogs.  I never pulled the trigger on the No. 6 zipper clogs, despite Ethan's urgings.  Something about the uncertainty of August onward chills the spending habits.  But I should celebrate small successes and treat myself.  And this certainly is a small success.

I'm so fired up right now to begin the work.  I told Ethan to remind me about my excitement when I'm cursing in about one and a half months...

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